I went to a private liberal arts college at 11 and completed a BS in math, physics, and computer science at 16. However, I also wrote for the student newspaper, competed on speech team, and went to the local high school's prom with my high school friends.
This, I think, kept me grounded. Yet when I went off to graduate school in pure mathematics, I was frozen. Whereas in my undergraduate years, I effortlessly comprehended the analysis and group theory flung at me, I learned in my first-year of graduate school that had been child's play. Study and work was now required. I failed again and again and it was painful (graduate students are not supposed to get B's).
Everything had come instantly to me in the past, so that almost no study was necessary. Things did not work this way in grad school, and I've been learning the work ethic for the past three years.
Yet my idiot brain still can't help but think "Noam Elkies' discovery about supersingular elliptic curves got him a doctorate when he was 20! Drin'feld proved the GL_2 case of the Langlands conjectures for the function field case when he 19, for chrissakes. What are you doing, dumbass?"
I'm still not sure how I turned out, or am turning out. I am a TA and have a high rating on ratemyprofessors.com, so at least my students like me. I'm learning salsa and hold weekly classic movie nights for my group of friends.
Just for shits and giggles, when one of my best friends from high school (who is a manager at Wendy's) suggested "you should be good at more than just academics, you should be good with girls, man," I dove into the world of game (not the tricks part, the improving yourself as a man and "naturally" charismatic being portion). Hilariously, that same friend now thinks of me less as a "genius" and more as a "womanizer"!
I am not and will never be as intelligent as the ideal my parents and childhood friends and teachers half-jokingly imposed when suggesting I will win four Nobel prizes before the age of 20. For those following a similar path, neither will you. So the trick is to take the cliche advice, stop agonizing over credentials and success, and just live life; learn some salsa, fall in love, do a startup, and backpack through Europe.
Where would you start out these days in the "world of game"? I also got an undergrad degree in math essentially without trying and have had some rough periods making it to adulthood without any work ethic but I think I've recovered and have built up a pretty successful programming career.
However, I have absolutely no ability to attract women and have experienced nothing but rejection for the last couple of years, and I may be beyond what game can fix. My problem is social awkwardness and it's the kind that runs all the way down - with people I am very comfortable with I am still very quiet, inarticulate, and don't have much ability to do conversational improvisation. Being in extremely good physical shape didn't make a difference and I've done Salsa too, where I'm literally always the last person women pick when they're all asked to partner up. I've done a year on internet personals with only rejection, and the same with speed dating - typical results would be me checking off 15/25 girls as yes and getting zero matches. I'm extremely non-picky with women. Everyone I meet likes me, but for sexual interest? Forget it. I'd love to be exactly the person I want, and socialize with women the way I would with men (i.e. just not giving a shit and saying what I want to) but this obviously isn't working for me! So gaming the evo-psychology system seems to be one of the few possibilities left.
It was one of the hardest things I've ever learned, surprisingly. My path took about two years and was reading up as much as I could, then doing "field work" for a few weeks, then alternating back to theory. After a while it all starts clicking.
Read all the archives of Roissy, Assanova, RooshV, PaulTheKing, KrauserPUA, ApproachAnxiety.com. Pay especial attention to the videos posted on Krauser's site and try to imitate his body language, vocal tone, and everything to the dot. It doesn't mean you can't have your own personality, but it helps you get that "dominance." Go overboard on the aggressiveness in the early phases. Learn perfect posture and don't apologize for a week. Buy Diesel jeans that make your ass look good. Find a style. Get a good haircut.
For you, the easiest "field work" path would be day game. Start by saying "hi" to everyone that passes by. People will look at you funny, but do it until you don't care anymore. Grab a camera and ask 100 people if you can take a picture with them ("it's for a bet, I need 100 pictures of me with a stranger"). Walk up to girls that are sitting and tell them they're cute and you had to say hi. Do the same but with walking girls. Get phone numbers. Stop caring about phone numbers and go for instant dates (get a coffee 10 minutes into the conversation). Make plans for second dates. You will get flakes. Keep reading and keep trying.
Note: If you read anything by LoveSystems or other commercial guys, know that it may be good as a beginner but it probably won't get you laid (especially Jeremy Soul's stuff). Go for bloggers and free material. If you can find Chopan's posts from fastseduction.com, they are gold. Lines and routines are useful as you're learning, but don't rely on them as you grow.
Go to attractionforums's sections on day game and read through past high-voted posts. Read Jon117's journal. Read Natural Game by Gambler (email me for a PDF).
As you're reading all of this, know that field work is always more important, but reading is easy and field work is hard, so while you're making up excuses and being a chickenshit at least use that time to keep reading.
Like I said, it's not easy. I probably put more effort into this than most undergraduates put into their degree.
Extra Credit: For shits and giggles, try the apocalypse opener until you don't get a negative reaction (when it works, you feel like Neo from the Matrix--and when it fails, I've had girls say "I...I can't...I'm sorry! :(" in an apologizing tone after I asked them, without any prior convo, "What are you doing later? Do you want to come home with me?" in an assertive manner.)
Extra Credit 2: Read all important high-commented topics on attractionforums's Online Game section. Set up an OkCupid account and try it with their suggestions. Online game worked so well for me that I had to check my inbox several times a day as I'd send out 20 messages and 15 would reply. It became too much of a hassle as I struggled to keep track of who was who and usually ended up on a date with girls that were much uglier or boring than their profile suggested. But it's fun to try.
Want to have some luck with women? Get involved in social activities (volunteering, book clubs, etc.), don't be a recluse, and never forget how awesome you are. The rest falls into place. Just be yourself and don't think too much.
This pick-up artist stuff is cliche, ineffective, and, worst of all, misanthropic. These people have a worldview that revolves around control and domination, and that's not a healthy mental state.
You're just lucky to have some natural attraction then I guess. I'm extremely confident in myself and sure of myself and women don't give a fuck. I do opera singing and salsa dancing and go to the gym regularly, am in outstanding shape, and am not even that shy any more. I've been on internet dating for two years and have tried speed dating a couple of times and can make friends with almost any man but have achieved precisely jack shit with women.
Trust me, if I had any choice at this point - any choice - other than trying to learn skills in gaming women's minds I'd be doing that.
Thank you very much for all the specific links and advice. The part I am trying to get over is how I think (and have thought for many years) that those guys just come across as pretentious dicks to me, and men who snap into a completely different personality as soon as a woman walks by fill me with some revulsion. I am very sensitive to bullshit myself and can't stand it in others and so maybe the main thing about Game that bothers me is how much it violates the golden rule for me. To impress me, just be who the fuck you are, you know?
That being said, I can't work around the fact that my sexual value isn't even just near zero right now, it's precisely zero. I'd probably settle down with any smart and nice woman who wasn't any worse than somewhat below average looking. Things that fall into place naturally for other men don't work for me. So it's basically a choice between never touching a girl in my life without paying for it or working my ass off for a few years to try and manipulate women enough that one or two will want to be close to me someday, and that's a much easier choice.
This, I think, kept me grounded. Yet when I went off to graduate school in pure mathematics, I was frozen. Whereas in my undergraduate years, I effortlessly comprehended the analysis and group theory flung at me, I learned in my first-year of graduate school that had been child's play. Study and work was now required. I failed again and again and it was painful (graduate students are not supposed to get B's).
Everything had come instantly to me in the past, so that almost no study was necessary. Things did not work this way in grad school, and I've been learning the work ethic for the past three years.
Yet my idiot brain still can't help but think "Noam Elkies' discovery about supersingular elliptic curves got him a doctorate when he was 20! Drin'feld proved the GL_2 case of the Langlands conjectures for the function field case when he 19, for chrissakes. What are you doing, dumbass?"
I'm still not sure how I turned out, or am turning out. I am a TA and have a high rating on ratemyprofessors.com, so at least my students like me. I'm learning salsa and hold weekly classic movie nights for my group of friends.
Just for shits and giggles, when one of my best friends from high school (who is a manager at Wendy's) suggested "you should be good at more than just academics, you should be good with girls, man," I dove into the world of game (not the tricks part, the improving yourself as a man and "naturally" charismatic being portion). Hilariously, that same friend now thinks of me less as a "genius" and more as a "womanizer"!
I am not and will never be as intelligent as the ideal my parents and childhood friends and teachers half-jokingly imposed when suggesting I will win four Nobel prizes before the age of 20. For those following a similar path, neither will you. So the trick is to take the cliche advice, stop agonizing over credentials and success, and just live life; learn some salsa, fall in love, do a startup, and backpack through Europe.