99% of people around me including close friends pretend sex, naughty bits and porn don't exist. It's this weird social norm black hole that makes other honest interactions feel less honest and more fake. And it's not a victim less thing either - like anything else that we pretend doesn't exist, it allows things and people and issues to fall through unspoken cracks.
Just like with any other topic in the world, if I don't want to hear details I don't need to hear details. And I really really don't want or need to hear 99% of details from more than. 99% percent of people :). But I'd like it to be a conscious choice not a social taboo of shame.
My 2 cents and note I wasn't born with this perspective - it took lots of work and many years to clear out my own social conditioning :-/
(that being said note that the article isn't even REMOTELY about pronography but an Interesting short anecdote about long lost video format and piece of television history. It's safe to read! Even if you're ashamed of your porn!:-)
Sexual shame damages people. I grew up in a Catholic household where my sex ed consisted of Focus On The Family's workbooks, and their blame and shame, sinful outlook on what turns out to be a normal part of most mammalian lives.
Echoing the sentiment of a sibling comment: this damaged me. I'm middle aged now, and some of residual shame-trauma still exists.
That shame mechanism is one of the things that enables sexual predators to repeatedly prey on others, because ashamed people don't report being sexually abused.
Fortunately, I didnt have to deal with that, but given my upbringing (Catholicism, Altar Boy, Boy Scouts), its just down to probability that I was lucky enough to not have been groomed by a pedophile.
There is definitely a place for things that are not shameful, but not spoken about. I am not ashamed to go to the bathroom, but do not talk about it.
I live in a society where all sex related things are in that category. It is impolite and discouraged to randomly talk about anything sex related. But if you have reason [for example consulting with someone with more experience], than it is encouraged and totally OK.
There are VERY strong social norms, including not to be queer, not to view porn, not to commit adultery [to use the example of the OP]. Someone struggling can talk openly to get help. Someone who disagrees (eg. gay) will usually leave the society where they are not accepted.
It is a shame to confuse privacy and self respect with shame.
And when will the people crying about virtue signaling admit the concept goes way, way back. Look at how popular necklaces with crosses are, as a prominent example.
Oh, sure, I agree. But it's never considered. People just seem focused on modern virtue signaling like sharing their belief that some people are transgender (or that that's even a thing). It's a weird right-wing cry fest, which is ironic because the right is associated with the aforementioned cross-based virtue signaling.
