I am a bit wary of the introvert/extrovert labeling, but have bought the bought and decided to read through it. Playing the game, I'd say I'm an introvert, and to be honest, the cool thing about this is realizing that all I really need is time for myself. It doesn't really matter what happens or what the circumstances are, as long as I have a book or a computer or a pencil I'm pretty much happy in my own little bubble.
Because I used to love sharing what I discovered in that little bubble so much, I went through a phase where I learned public speaking, and also connecting to people. I usually do this one and one, but find it very easy to establish deep connections by actually cutting through the "bullshit". I then started a company, and had to put myself out there quite a bit more. Having had no real experience of social contacts before though (except these connections with I have to admit people pretty much far out there), I went far overboard, which came back to bite me. I think that is the biggest issue with all the "introversion" (not really thinking about reaching out to other people, maybe even not really thinking about myself as a person nor other people at all). I have no real concept of emotions, of how people could react, that people can do things that hurt, that you can do things that hurt other people, etc... I am now 30, I still believe that people are fundamentally good, but I see the shades of gray in their actions. That's stuff that more "extrovert" people probably learn at age 15.
The older I get the more I realize that I actually need social contact, at least a few times a week. And I'm definitely struggling with that very much. After that "getting out there thing", and running into a few quite hurtful things, I completely lashed out to the other side, going back to my hacking and art and what not, but actually actively destroying everything I produce (unless it's for a client) so that other people won't notice, and I don't feel the need to talk about it. It's a hard habit to get out from. And I still don't actually know if it would be better for other people to notice, or if being the submarine in a society where most people you notice are actively craving for recognition. Recognition feels empty, while being happy on your own is much more rewarding.
I hope that this book (it may be nicely written and founded, or just another substanceless self-help book) will instill a small spark of self-confidence by just putting a label on my behaviour. That never hurts.
Because I used to love sharing what I discovered in that little bubble so much, I went through a phase where I learned public speaking, and also connecting to people. I usually do this one and one, but find it very easy to establish deep connections by actually cutting through the "bullshit". I then started a company, and had to put myself out there quite a bit more. Having had no real experience of social contacts before though (except these connections with I have to admit people pretty much far out there), I went far overboard, which came back to bite me. I think that is the biggest issue with all the "introversion" (not really thinking about reaching out to other people, maybe even not really thinking about myself as a person nor other people at all). I have no real concept of emotions, of how people could react, that people can do things that hurt, that you can do things that hurt other people, etc... I am now 30, I still believe that people are fundamentally good, but I see the shades of gray in their actions. That's stuff that more "extrovert" people probably learn at age 15.
The older I get the more I realize that I actually need social contact, at least a few times a week. And I'm definitely struggling with that very much. After that "getting out there thing", and running into a few quite hurtful things, I completely lashed out to the other side, going back to my hacking and art and what not, but actually actively destroying everything I produce (unless it's for a client) so that other people won't notice, and I don't feel the need to talk about it. It's a hard habit to get out from. And I still don't actually know if it would be better for other people to notice, or if being the submarine in a society where most people you notice are actively craving for recognition. Recognition feels empty, while being happy on your own is much more rewarding.
I hope that this book (it may be nicely written and founded, or just another substanceless self-help book) will instill a small spark of self-confidence by just putting a label on my behaviour. That never hurts.