I worked really hard in school, and when I got my golden ticket to silicon valley I was so excited to leave the corn fields and start my new life. I knew zero people in the Bay Area, but my coworkers and roommates (and roommates’ friends) were enough of a social circle for me; I loved my work and my team. One year later, CA lockdowns hit and everyone I knew left CA or moved back to familys’ million dollar homes. I was left adrift, not wanting to go back to the cornfields, expecting things to reasonably end soon, working remotely, and alone. They did not reasonably end: I grew more and more depressed and isolated. I tried but zero in-network providers were taking new patients for therapy/psychologists, and the (sigh) remote therapy options just felt more isolating. I vividly remember having a good conversation on betterhelp, only for the call to end and just be left there sitting alone in my room, silence.. I talked to managers about it, but they told me I should watch more Netflix, and likely just furthered the decision to lay me off.
Getting laid off was the best thing to happen to me. The work culture that led to it being done over zoom, was the worst.
This is your experience and is valid. But I would think about something. Those people left through their personal choice.
Many workplace relationships are like this. I met some great people at work. They left, or I left, and I never spoke to them again. Work brought us together, but it was just work. After one of us would leave, we chose to spend our times with other people we'd rather spend time with. I've had maybe a handful of friends actually be friends when work changed and we were no longer on that same team. It's not personal, it's just life.
My dad was a workaholic and never cultivated his life outside of work. When he finally retired he realized he didn't have any real friendships aside from a few. I make sure I do things outside of my occupation for this very reason.
It doesn't sound to me like GP was placing blame on people for leaving of their own accord and it really doesn't help to disparage how people get their social interaction. I enjoy the social aspect of the office and someone leaving has no bearing on that.
I wasn't insinuating that or disparaging anyone. I was simply suggesting that work can put on a façade of socialization but you can be left burned by it, and GP was. It's not a fun situation to be in and I feel for him, and is also why I make friends through shared interests outside of work, because one day you can get fired, or your team gets fired, or your company goes under and everyone gets fired. And then you realize that guy talking to you about your weekend at the watercooler doesn't actually care, and won't be calling after you got fired. The GP was very clearly affected by this. It could be mitigated by not relying solely on professional atmospheres for friends.
It’s no different that being burned by college or high school friends moving away. Just because people leave your life doesn’t mean there isn’t a connection that you can enjoy while they’re in your life.
FWIW, I still keep in contact, digitally, with people from HS, college, and previous jobs.
No, it isn't, but college/high school has way more opportunities to meet people and friends than in the workplace - you aren't spending 8+ hours at work at these times, there's ample opportunity to meet others (changing classes every year, prebuilt extracurriculars, etc.) These opportunities simply don't exist in the workforce, where it's typically the same group of people in the office. Extroverts like yourself may do just fine but not everyone is like this. The sample size of people you meet who also want to meet other people is exponentially higher in high school/college.
Again, the statistics show this. People really struggle with making friends, especially as they get older (when they're working.)
Getting laid off was the best thing to happen to me. The work culture that led to it being done over zoom, was the worst.