I wholeheartedly agree with the advice of getting to know each other deeply and sticking with them through tough times. The most rewarding moments of my career came from mentoring relationships where that played out well (and there is no guarantee that it will with every mentee). Some of those relationships have literally been life changing for me. We all go through painful experiences, but passing on the learning that comes from those experiences gives the experiences deeper meaning, at least for me. I went from feeling pain when thinking about some of those experiences to feeling like they were great investments in my mentees. I only wish I'd done more mentoring earlier.

I retired last year. I've been lucky to have the opportunity to continue mentoring a few of the people I was closest to in the last few years of my career. Those chats are still the highlights of my week. What those relationships look like is deep two-way trust. I trust that they are going to be vulnerable enough to be honest about what they find challenging, that they'll listen to my advice, and they'll think critically about what parts of that advice make sense for them. They trust that I'm going to continue believing in them even when they stumble, that I'm going to be both honest and kind about assessing their successes / failures, and that I'm excited to learn along with them. When that level of trust is reached, the learning for both of us takes off. And it fills me with joy.