How does fertility dropping below 2.1 have anything to do with not valuing kids? I'd say its because we do value kids and don't value the adults that are choosing not to bring more kids into the world.
I don’t know about valuing kids - maybe they are valued enough, in a very direct sense.
But, as a parent of three kids, it’s very very obvious that modern western society is not really made for bringing up children in a good way. I could list multiple reasons, but IMO the most important one is that raising children with 1-2 parents, and not as a tribe or colocated big family, is super hard and a non-stop grind. It’s not possible to retrofit this kind of support with government mediated interventions, like gratis kindergarten, financial support, etc. You are always the first and last in line, as a typical, western parent. I can totally understand anyone who doesn’t want that kind of constant stress and often unhappiness in their lives.
No, if we truly valued children, we would seek to make more children, and devote substantial portions of our lives and resources to raising children.
But increasingly, society doesn’t give a shit about children. People value more their own individual autonomy, their vacations, their luxury goods, their comfort, over the responsibility and work involved in raising children. Children have lower value than ever in this world, reduced to units of potential future economic output, or accessories for your next instagram reel or photo.
Valuing them as in being enthusiastic about making more is different from valuing them as in caring for them. Few of them these days get sick and die in infancy, and it's no longer legal to send them to work. These factors have reduced enthusiasm. But the notion of being responsible about them is modern, and is a sign of increased care, or anyway social pressure to care.
