The Science of When to Get Married

petercooper · on April 7, 2009

Good article and a great highlight of just how crazy brain chemicals end up making a lot of our decisions for us. I'd just add, don't even think of getting married for the sex - that all changes.

electromagnetic · on April 7, 2009

Actually I don't think the quantity of sex actually changes after getting married. I think people think "Well we spend about 10 hours a week together, and we have sex like 3 times... that should mean in a 168 hour week I'll have sex like 50 times!" No, you'll still only have sex 3 times in a week.

My wife and I used to live in separate countries (before we were married) so when we saw each other we managed to get about 4 months worth of sex into 2 weeks. I get just as much sex now that am married as I did before I was married, just now I don't have to go through 4 months of celibacy in between it.

Honestly the sex doesn't change, if anything I get more now that I'm married, and I certainly get it more regularly.

My personal advice: never expect to get more sex by getting married. If you get it n times a week, evaluate if that amount is enough for the next 30 years, if it's not slap yourself in the face because if you fuck it up you could well get 0 times a week for the next 30 years. C'mon we're geeks, our chances for sex aren't astronomically high.

ananthrk · on April 7, 2009

(Content in a single page) http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2009-04-07/th...

In the middle of all the chemical names, this is the only one that stayed

“Start acclimating to uncertainty as a way of life.”

:)

io · on April 7, 2009

"'The rational brain can only take in seven pieces of information at one time,' Lehrer says. 'When it gets more than that, it’s like an old computer trying to run Vista.'"

Zing!

Will Vista's legacy be a pop-culture simile for an overburdened machine?

henryw · on April 7, 2009

it didn't really answer the question 'When to Get Married' in a concrete manner. i wish we had a way to rate these articles from 1 star to 5 stars next to the title like for yahoo movies.

dandelany · on April 7, 2009

Agreed, I was hoping this article would contain the distribution of divorce rate vs. age, which I found at: http://www.divorcerate.org/

Interestingly enough, the divorce rate is highest for those who get married between the ages of 20-24, 10% higher for women and 27% higher for men than the <20 category.

electromagnetic · on April 7, 2009

> The men she approached as they were crossing were much likely to call her in the coming days. Why? “The scientists attributed it to the misidentification of those bodily symptoms of fear,” says Lehrer. “They thought they were aroused and attracted, but they were only scared.” The men she approached as they were crossing were much likely to call her in the coming days. Why? “The scientists attributed it to the misidentification of those bodily symptoms of fear,” says Lehrer. “They thought they were aroused and attracted, but they were only scared.”

And that's why some men marry women they're afraid of.

steveplace · on April 8, 2009

When it comes to romantic decision-making, neuroscientists say the rational part of our brain gets dumped.

Yes. The blood flows out of the head and into other parts.

dbul · on April 7, 2009

  while(!successful) {
    successful = AttemptSuccess();
  }
  ExploreMarriage();