Okay, having just followed the link in your profile and looking at your picture, dude, trust me you're not ugly. I actually honestly think you're a handsome guy, judging purely by appearances.
But anyway. You know, I've noticed that people who fixate on appearances tend to be irrationally harsh. You'd be surprised how big a part confidence and charisma plays in the overall attraction people feel for one another. You don't need to spend any dollar on surgery, just work on your confidence, be cheerful, and learn to carry yourself well.
1st rule of being ugly: Every ugly person has at least 1 really good picture that hides all of their flaws or is easily photoshoppable to hide flaws. Use any combination of lighting, shadows, cropping, facial hair to get this effect.
2nd rule: Find that picture and use it for everything.
3rd rule: People will be confused when they see you in real life and realize you look different from your picture. They will be disappointed. So you have to work really hard to try to match whatever level of attractiveness you have in your picture. If you're a guy and you've never put on makeup, you may need to learn.
If you think this level or worrying is too much and obsessive, I'd like to ask you this. If the way people treat you changes depending on how you look when you leave the house, you too would "worry about it".
Again, I'm not devastated that I'm ugly. I'm devastated that people treat me differently because I'm ugly. Especially after all the "everyone's beautiful in their own way" rhetoric I've heard my whole life. There's lots of people who are super successful, rich, and happy with families and they're ugly. What angers me is being treated differently because of something that I cannot control.
If anyone in the street just straight up tells anyone they're "ugly", something is seriously fucked up about them.
Seriously, go to http://www.reddit.com/r/malefashionadvice/ and get some tips. Get a new haircut that suits you, maybe consider using some hair product, if you have acne issues or something see a dermatologist, get proper fitting clothes, etc. etc.
it's up to you but with that many sentences and enumerated rules of response you might consider making your rebuttal by linking to what you would consider a more typical picture of you.
it's very hard to have this discussion when what we see is what you think of as a deceptively handsome picture. why not compare with a more typical one. we don't think what we have seen is deceptive we think it's just you.
I'm a woman who would hardly be considered "traditionally attractive" and it's always worked for me. People's opinions of your looks change based on how they view your personality.
Couldn't agree more. Actual personality and personability go much further than looks. It's just important to have that confidence and ease about you. Which, granted, may be hard if one's grown up thinking they are ugly. But once you get the tricks of smiling, reading others, and conveying a positive personality, the world opens up. Big time.
The article covers this topic of confidence. It says that only 15 to 20% of the wage increase attractive people gain is because of confidence. The rest is due to bias from the person in charge of hiring.
Okay, having just followed the link in your profile and looking at your picture, dude, trust me you're not ugly. I actually honestly think you're a handsome guy, judging purely by appearances.
But anyway. You know, I've noticed that people who fixate on appearances tend to be irrationally harsh. You'd be surprised how big a part confidence and charisma plays in the overall attraction people feel for one another. You don't need to spend any dollar on surgery, just work on your confidence, be cheerful, and learn to carry yourself well.