I think the problem here is "startup", not "Bay Area". I also worked at startups for 4 years, and there were a grand total of 5 women in them (only one of whom was unmarried, and she was the founder's niece). But that was in Boston.
Both teams I've been on at Google have been about 40% female (one was 42%; the other was 40%). My cubicle is 3 women and 4 men. Most of the social outings have been fairly well-balanced; a few have even been majority female. I lived with 2 girls in my old apartment, and I see mostly women around at my new apartment. This is all South Bay, not San Francisco.
Really??? I need to get a job at Google, apparently. :)
I've found that the difficulty in dating in the Bay Area isn't necessarily the shortage of women, but the overwhelming majority of men. The numbers probably dictate that they're equal, but this is an disadvantageous situation when the South Bay self-selects older, wealthier men and less young, single women.
Realistically, if you live in a large city, you really have nothing to complain about. Farmers, people in rural areas actually do have a case to make in this respect.
From my experience, guys who can't meet girls (or the opposite) still complain no matter what city they're in, no matter how stacked the odds are for them. I think that straight guys should consider themselves lucky -- imagine if you were gay and could only date 4% of the population. Not only that, but gay guys can't even tell who else they could potentially date and who would be offended by them asking!
> Not only that, but gay guys can't even tell who else they could potentially date and who would be offended by them asking!
Uh... the same is true for straight guys (and for women). The odds might be better, but not every woman wants to date a man, and not every woman (regardless of orientation) is open to being hit on at a particular moment.
The odds are much better but I think the far more significant difference is that a man asking a woman is socially accepted whereas a man asking a man is not (in most places).
